“His piece of cake is bigger than mine!”
“She’s smarter, more attractive and will probably get the job over me.”
“Looking at a few ‘questionable’ videos and sites is not having an affair like most people.”
“I wish my husband were more like …”
Comparison seems to be engrained within us from an early age and progresses as we get older—whether we are hungering for a bigger piece of cake, the neighbor’s boat, or comparing our actions to someone else.
Those last three words are where the problem with comparison lie: to someone else.
I would know since I’ve had years of practice comparing myself to others.
I believe the issue reared its’ ugly head most blatantly when I became bulimic in high school. It’s still kind of embarrassing to write about, but I do because God can use it. It’s much easier to write about bulimia through the fictional character, Krystal in my series Beauties from Ashes.
As with other eating disorders, bulimia is psychological and physical. I wasn’t happy with myself inside or out. My story with the eating disorder is unique because God did a miraculous healing when I was nineteen. For this, I will always be grateful.
Although I was not binging and purging, I was still comparing.
Comparison is a pendulum that swings radically. On one side there is dissatisfaction and inferiority. On the other side are pride and superiority. And in our ever-connected world, we have the opportunity to compare ourselves to others at our fingertips constantly.
The Dangers of Comparisons
- It’s Not Fair
We are unique and valuable individuals created by God with characteristics and life events that belong solely to us alone. It isn’t fair to compare our God-given uniqueness to someone else who is nothing like us and never will be.
- It Damages Relationships with Others and God
There are a host of problems that endanger our relationships: jealousy, unrealistic expectations, and taking what we have for granted.
- It Prevents Us from Being Happy
How can we be truly grateful and happy if we are constantly coveting and comparing?
- It is Sin
“But they are only comparing themselves with each other, using themselves as the standard of measurement. How ignorant!” 2 Corinthians 10:12
“You must not covet your neighbor’s house. You must not covet your neighbor’s wife, male or female servant, ox or donkey, or anything else that belongs to your neighbor.” Exodus 20:17
Remember how I told you that although I was not binging and purging, I was still comparing?
I’ve come to realize that comparing makes us sick all the same.
Those who are sick need a doctor. I’m not referring to an MD. I’m talking about the Great Physician: Jesus Christ. He is the only one capable of doing the heart renovation necessary to heal from the disease of comparison.
“Jesus answered them, ‘Healthy people don’t need a doctor—sick people do.’”
What to Do About Comparing
- Acknowledge the Problem and Ask God for Help
Prayer: Father, I confess I have sinned against you and others by comparing and coveting. I need you to transform the way I think and help me not conform to the patterns of this world as it says in Romans 12:1-3. Often comparing comes so naturally to me that I don’t realize I’m doing it. Those thoughts are toxic and separate me from you and from being the confident person you call me to be. Please alert me with your Holy Spirit so I can stop, confess and take the thought captive (2 Cor 10:5) through your son, Jesus in whose mighty name I pray, AMEN.
- Rely on God’s Opinion Rather than the Opinion of Others
“Obviously, I’m not trying to win the approval of people, but of God. If pleasing people were my goal, I would not be Christ’s servant.” Galatians 1:10
- Remember Who and Whose You Are
I’m not saying that I don’t still struggle with comparison. But what I am saying is God has helped me grow tremendously as I have surrendered those ugly thoughts to Him. And let me tell you, it’s a daily exercise. However, I no longer feel like a slave to comparison! If I can do it, so can you!
Each of us is valuable to God. In fact, we are precious treasures worth dying for. Below is a printable list of Scriptures that prove your value to God called Who I Am In Christ. Click:who-i-am-in-christ
I pray this post is helpful. Please feel free to share comments & prayers below.
In Christ’s love,
If you or someone you know is struggling with an eating disorder, there is faith-based help available.
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